Lipton Ice tea.

Today, while coming out of college, a friend and I decided to have something to drink. He thought Lipton Ice tea was healthy, and initially, I did not want to buy it. He got a bottle, I thought I would just walk along and take a sip or two. However, the shopkeeper told us that we would get a third free if we bought ourselves another one.

Turns out marketing gimmicks do not work on stupid people only. Or rather, turns out I am stupid after all. Now we have this tendency to sing in trains for some reason. We are unabashed about this because the college timings are such that there is very little crowd in the trains. There are amazing things that happen because of this, when we were singing “papa kehte hain” from “Qayamat se Qayamat tak” for example, the train stopped in front of a guy peeing on the tracks when the “aisa kaam karega” part came. Shocked the poor guy out of his pants – but he was already half out, so it wasn’t a difficult thing to do. Cruel friends began to scare people excreting along the tracks after this, and found it amazing to watch them fall over and such. Imagine you are happily shitting and some bunch of weirdos come along in this train and scare the shit out of you…and… er… to use the same joke twice, something that is half way out anyway. I do not endorse this behavior, and this hasn’t happened in front of me, so I could not stop it, but still, I could not stop myself from laughing when friends told me about this.
Anyway, I stray, now, this group that sings in the train (and scares the crap out of crapping people) were walking with us while we had gotten the three bottles of Lipton ice tea. We were, for some reason, singing, probably thinking that we were in the train. The point is, I was singing, and turned around slightly dancing, and my head hit this pole that was for some reason in the middle of the footpath. I lost my balance, fell to the ground, and people around me started rubbing my head and such. I was actually laughing, despite all of this, because the ringing sound that my head made against the pole was funny even to my ears. People started suggesting other people to get ice from a nearby sugarcane vendor, when I thought too much fuss was being made over me. I looked up, people were relieved to see me laughing. I got up, and two guys were laughing more than was accountable by my head hitting against the pole. I asked them what had happened, and this chap replied that apparently, when I was down, two men walked past, and one of them gestured by putting a clenched fist with a protruding thumb to his mouth. Bastard was suggesting that I was drunk.
It was only then did I realized how much like beer Lipton iced Tea looks. This means (a) I am never having iced tea again and (b) now I can consume beer at home if only I put it in a Lipton ice tea bottle.