Then he opens my thighs and kisses my belly
And puts his tool in my hand to make it knock at my door
Soon he is in the cave, and I feel pleasure approaching
He shakes me and trills me and hotly we both are working...
This is not from some jeuvenile fantasy, instead its from a classic, "The perfumed Garden", a very rare Arabic equivalent of the Kama Sutra. One thing that you realise is that words like "member", "tool", "machine", "cave", "chamber" and "hole" are all absolutely ancient petnames for genitelia, and not a recent occurance... what's more, it was considered more polite, even scientific than penis or vagina. Weird eh? Anyway, here is a hilarious poem I really wanted to blog about... it's about the two wives an entertainer has got and is moaning about:
By reason of my ignorance I have married two wives -
And why do you complain, O husband of two wives?
I said to myself, I shall be like a lamb between them;
I shall take my pleasure upon the bosoms of my two sheep,
And I have become like a ram betweentwo female jackals,
Days follow upon days, and nights upon nights,
and their yoke bears me down during both days and nights.
If I am kind to one, the other gets vexed.
And so I cannot escape from these two furies.
If you want to live well and with a free heart,
And with your hands unclenched, then do not marry.
If you must wed, then marry one wife only:
One alone is enough to satisfy two armies.
And also, something that might not be found anywhere else, a list of all those weird sexual positions in arabic, and some innovative ones which maybe even the KS cannot match:
El Asemeud: The stopperage
El Modefeda: Frog fashion
El mokefa: With the toes cramped
El Mokermeutt: Legs in the air
El Setouri: he-goat fashion
El loulabi: The screw of Archimedes
El kelouci: The summersault
Hachou en nekanok: The tail of the Ostrich
Lebeuss el djoureb: Fitting on the sock
Kechef el astine: Reciprocal sight of the posteriors
Neza el kouss: The rainbow arch
Nesedj el kheuzz: Alternative piercing
Dok el arz: pounding on the spot (WTF?) (hehe... what the FUCK?)
Nik el kohoul: coition from the back
El keurchi: Belly to belly
El Kebachi: ram fashion
Dok el outed: Driving the peg home
Sebek el heub: love's fusion
Tred el miche: Interchange in coition
Rekeud el air: The race of the member
El modakheli: the fitter-in
El khouariki: the one who stops in the house
Nik el haddadi: the smith's coition
El meheundi: the seducer
So in arrabic, Kechef el astine is apparently 69ing...
cheers.
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