towel < newspaper

Its impolite to argue with a dead man, but sorry Adams the towerl sucks as an intergalaxtic companion for the wanderer. Whether ur in the deeps of space, in the mountainz or in jungal, a newspaper is handier than a towel. Sure you can suck specail vitamins from the endds of towerls and it does not get destroyed when it gets wet, but at least you dont have to deal with the god damn lint.

First of all there is the cost factor a newspaper is practically free when compared to the cost of getting a towel. You can prolly get 50 newspapers for the cost of a towel. Also a newspaper has a bunchh of sheets, which make it a lot moar versatile. You can use it liek tissue paper. If your actually out in the wild, its pretty good to sit on, eat on, start fires with and even as bedding material.
You can make a hat with it evan if it gets sunny. In fact a variety of hats. Hmm, you can also tear it up into perfect squares and try out origami, if you accept the paper quality as a challenge? Paper rockets. Yes? No? Theres literally hours of time you can spend doing different things with a newspaper. The crosswored, usually there are two of em along with those dokus. You can even read the news. Then read the news slowly, or find stuff in the news or make a list of errors and inconsistencies or try to fins codes and hidden meanings. Aslo, you can liek use it to clean weed, wrap drugs, turn it into a roll and whack people with, crumple it into balls and launch missiles.
You still wanna towelr? Fuck towerls.

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