Thursday, December 30, 2004

paper leaks

damn man, i know atleast two guys who can give me the papers. I am facing my biggest dilemma now, I have to pay nuts, and seriously, no one will ever know. But then, somehow, i can't bring myself to do it. sometimes i feel like taking them, sometimes i feel like not taking them. i am never going to take them, that is what i am feeling right now, but you can never say really...
I am not going to take it. even if i fail, no matter what happens i am not going to take it. hey, i'll make that my new year resolution - i will not take the papers.
The only real reason i am not touching them is that i am damn scared of what will happen if i am caught, though i am certain i wont, i don't even want to take the .0000001 percent risk of doing it. later in my life, i wil have to look back and sya damn i cheated, i don't want that.
but what if i look back and say damn if i would have taken them, things would be so much better.
this is really the most indesisive i have ever been in my life.

I am a soldier of fortune

got jp and a bunch of really nice rocks songs that I have never even heard before, and have only slightly heard the names of the bands. it seems moist vagina and some scuicidical song of nirvana have been banned, and somehow, i have both of them on my pc. i have no idea from where it came.
anyway, so there's p's brother whose come from somewhere like kuwait, but i'm not too sure, and he cracked a really good joke. a,a, me,and p's bro were talking about the mood-i fest in iit powai, and we were worried about the leopards, so this guy says that the rock concert will probably drive them away, so this other guy says, maybe a deaf leopard will show up, or should i say deff lepard?
not seen jp yet, but swades is cool. not seen matlab, not seen it on the vcd i got. seems vcds are going out of fashion in the us. saw bits of far and away today... cool movie. somewhat.
however, the tv has begun to show outright double ex porn, that too on the cable networks, and these politicians fight about some really ok shit being shown on sat tv, when their own admi log are showing utter tasteless vulger crap in the local circles.
no matter what swades says, if the savior kalki doesen't come soon, we are really doomed.
i don't think he/she will come.
damn we are really doomed.


finally this shit loaded. Took a long time to. Msn so totally sucks, every time I try to sign in, the page not available error loads up and the computer sits still like a scared rabit in october.
Now i have nothing to do but rant on this blog, and the blog failed to load too. I need cable net or atleast dsl. this dialup shit is not for me. it is to damn slow. i ranted in inverse handwriting on a bottle.
anyway, got the original washingtonionine finally. have it saved. Its right here at blogspot! cool no?
eighteen yellow roses. nice song.
Playing deus ex now, am messing about in hongkong. 50 days to go for the boards, or about that much. I AM SURELY GOING TO FAIL THE MOST IMPORTANT EXAMS OF MY LIFE. Damn.
eighteen yellow roses will wilt and die one day...

new song just loaded. wondering what it is. Listening to winamp. winamp3 is soooo much better than winamp5. winamp3 has a cooler sort feature, a cooler media library, only lesser skin support...
writing another nice story about a temporal shift...
the "snail" is hibernating. the snail is a ovoid sticker that i cut halfway through and folded up to look like a snail. its been stuck on the cieling by me for like forever now. Will upload a pic of it if I feel like it.

last one tonite

damn its late, but when I start writing, theres just so much to tell, that i cannot be stopped. I think i will pass the exams, with more than fifty percent, no matter what the stars tell about it, i will have to shit mysrelf out in the maths department, but i will do what it takes to get fairly decent grades. damn, man all of this is A's fault. HE was such a bully when i was a kid, destroyed my self confidence, and made me into the embarrassment that I was. fortunately college came along, and i got to get away from the stigma of the old reputation that i had gathered. it is thrown back into my face every now and then, but i can handle it now.
thanks to coll friends, i am really confident now. I thought i was a wierd geek guy, but then, i found out that i was, and it was perfectly ok to be one. i don't actually care much anymore. b read my starchart and said that i would go abroad for work, like that wasnot going to happen anyway.
hey cool, john denver came up now.
another nice song.
you are always on my mind. i recorded that country song from a's casette.
just to keep the record straight, i never use names, but only the first alphabet of ppl so that atleast i remember who i am talking about, even if you probably have no clue. just forr the heck of it, here is a list...
nah, will put it up some other day, after pondering over it properly and thinking everything out...
chool guitar chords
you were always on my mind...
tell me that your sweet love hasn't died...
give me one more chance to keep you satisfied...
ah what the hell, kalki will probably come and blow it all up, so who really cares anyway. will listen to these songs and finally slip out into the realms of eternal sleep. getiing a bitt s.llepoky now, ansd am typing anydamndugbt thing thahrth conejtb i rtoi my mind, and ui am just bloody jabbing at jtkbsdjfndfiug j nbt hrbthb the keyboard oinbjk kint a random mnasbehre an dnf dtg roghuhly ruining myyyyy finge9803u450rs over theeeeeeeeeeeee keyoibopard, ,,,,, get hthhee? ideea44a??? do you knowwwwwwwwwwwwwwww ihiihow sleeeeeeepoi9y i A#m?
hahahahah bawhawhawhhwh ho ho ho nad a bottle of rum, bend over eminem here i cum...
ok gooooooooodnight


such a perfect abba song.
saw a bit of encino man today. Has become a part of me now. Want a vcd or dvd of it desperately.
I don't talk about such shit here... but this is just so perfect...

I'd like to dedicate this song to mother earth
Where are those happy days,
they seem so hard to find
I try to reach for you but you have closed your mind
What ever happened to our love?
I wish I understood
It used to feel so nice, it used to be so good
So when you're near me, darling can't you hear me S.O.S.
The love you gave me, nothing else can save me S.O.S.
When you're gone, how can I even try to go on?
When you're gone, well I try, how can I carry on?
You seem so far away but you are standing nearer
You make me feel alive but something died
I fearI really tried to make it out I wish I understood
What happened to our love, it used to be so good
So when you're near me, darling can't you hear me S.O.S.
The love you gave me, nothing else can save me S.O.S.
When you're gone, how can I even try to go on?
When you're gone, ooh I try, how can I carry on?
So when you're near me, darling can't you hear me S.O.S.
The love you gave me, nothing else can save me S.O.S.
When you're gone, how can I even try to go on?
When you're gone, ooh I try, how can I carry on?
When you're gone, how can I even try to go on?
When you're gone, ooh I try, how can I carry on?
I am feeling like crying but I am not. A's parents like Abba. Even NC likes abba. some movie they watched together yeah-Abba the movie. And Dad likes abba too.
And very recently, I really like Abba
they were offered a billion friggin bucks to get their act together again, and the friggin refused. they REFUSED a billion friggin bucks! are they crazy! do they know what kind of money that is? I really want them to come together again, and get the original shit, nothing from crap like abba teens.
saw miss congeniality today, cool movie, but a little bland. thought i would never see a dumb hollywood production, but saw one where a bunch of kids are on an island, searching for underwear (wierd right) and they wake up some monster who kills them all. I dont know whats the name of the movie, or who's in it, except jaime presley.
and by the way, just wondering, why isn't there a male equivalent for the word 'slut'?

does your mother know

I know I just blogged. damn there is so much to say.
Thats the song I am listening right now. ABBA rocks!
anyway, reading moorcock's nomad of the time streams, exteremely political books, but one of the few justifications of the world wars that I have seen, and I learnt so much. Have a big maths test tommorrow, will surely fail, and everyone knows that. Biology went well though, think I more than aced it. I knew EVERYTHING> I wrote with such confidence. No, actually i hadn't studied much, but I knew most of it, and remembered it there, and faked confidance where I didn't know, and bluffed a lot, but I am surte I will get the marks. P was struggling though, he was crying a lot about not getting the answers. N kept asking me and jabbing his finger at my back. I let him copy a few answerts, but went on writing. P has no tension of the boards though. He already has the papers. I've seen them. A load of boys have offered to sell me the board papers. they are already leaked, I obviously refused. One was gonna give em to me for free...
India is so damn corrupt man...
lay all your love on me...
abba so totally rocks man!

Sunday, December 26, 2004

what is it

Maybe it is all an illusion. Maybe it is.

I am not going to do this

well, I am not...
but if anything happens...
I'll blame it on the boredom.
I am just afraid of being caught, there is no way to test it without actually risking your everything...
so I am MOST PROBABLY not going to do it, but somehow, I want to prove to myself that i can...
just for the heck of it...

who the hell cares

Originally Posted by Sparks-Kelly
Well, There was this channel leaving the www into a local Computer farm, When I followed I encountered A High Security Cypher. When I finally Broke through, I was Logged and Pinned Almost Immeaditly, apparently There was Extremely Classified Stuff Back there. I was lucky to be a Minor and Pleaded Guilty right into Juvy. But that was all. Imagine if i wasn't 12 at the time.Next time, remember to use your best viruses to buy yourself some time to get into the garbage file and copy the worm.

I know how to do this shit man!!!


shit happens.
nice saying. Sums up everything I can possibly feel for anything that happends anywhere. am ranting now. Am totally bored and have this huge test tommorrow. I have a huge test everyday now that I am in the eleventh hour of the HSC.
Shit happens
See? I totally works.
some guy had troubleshooting. Some guy had trouble shooting his dog. Thought for the day: you know what? i am ranting. Theres this guy I know who claims to have a twelve inch dick. I was fantasizing about it.
Shit Happens.
I am not gay, though I am totally not considering it.
Almost done one fourth of the way through deus ex.

Saturday, December 25, 2004

critique culture

some wierd guy was ranting on about life. There is only one real purpose. Sex.
Hotmail is so slow.
I harte msn, I hate ms, and I just want to HACK THE BLOODY PLANET.
Might have already done it ;)
Shit man, it is really slow. I want to do some shit with critique culture. lesee whatgoesonnow
totallethargyandrefusalto use the bloodyspacebutton
you see?
no stigma, read the tail of the eternal champion: nomad of the time streams. a political but cool book. one of the most intelligent story undertones that I can ever expect to see.
damn, msn is really slow...

Friday, December 24, 2004

long time no see

reading a VERY cool book, nomad of the time streams by moorcock right now. Am dreaming of swimming through the time streams. A nice short story called god's eye view is brewing up in my head. Shows how god looks at the univers. Like in the most detailes resolution, each version of the universe is an array of all the individual particles. A slightly burnt down version would be small protons or electrons and their absolute state. a much simplified and vulger picture would be small objects (like packets of air or grass) changing shape as they slip through time. Also, matter disappearing from one cell in the array and reappearing elsewhere. All this is the representation of a single universe, whereas there are many others. infact, in an exponentially growing program (like a virus) absolute existance, is the permutations and combinations of every single particle in every possible ways. Like on some earths in some universes, the colors will be different, or just one small blade of grass in japan would be different, and there would be as many universes as there were blades of grass, and in fact as many particles contained in a finite universe. So basically, its a big number, which is not even a tiny negligible infinitesimal fraction of infinity....
nice story i think, but totally incomprehensible even to me.
wrote a couple of new ones, don't have the energy to upload them...
called Karan. birthday august 12, I have to remember that. ok

Dream Diary Goats and Rabbits Edition

I am in some northern village in the mountains, and my mother urges me to become rich, and have some ambition. I tell her in a very determin...